Saturday, July 17, 2010

Needs a Girdle from Time to Time

For those who have read my blog, you know I have a feisty grandmother who I take after a lot, and I had a very meek grandmother. My grandmother was the meekest person I have ever known, and if I hadn't had her in my life I don't know that I would have had as good an example. What is amazing to me is that her childhood included abandonment by her father, living through the Depression, watching her mother suffer, being shuffled from home to home when her mother had a breakdown. She suffered in a difficult marriage, and then she raised three knot-headed boys. My daddy being the youngest of said boys. She still referred to them as her "boys" when she died and they were in their 60s and 70s.

I heard a story from my daddy, of course, about my grandmother that cracks me us. I'm not sure what the "boys" had done this time, but she had called them in to give them what they needed…instead they ran from her. WRONG ANSWER! Even the meekest of the earth have their limits. Grandma had done her laundry that day and had hung her unmentionables out to dry. Unfortunately for the "boys" she had hung her girdle on the closet door in their room. When they flew by her to their room, she was hot and heavy on their heels. The boys continued to run around the room trying to avoid her grasp. Her hands hungry to get a hold of someone or something grabbed her girdle, and she came out swinging.

Now for those who are too young to know what a girdle is a girdle came after the corset. It had ties at the bottom to connect to their nylons/stockings. The corset's purpose was to squeeze a woman into a smaller, smoother figure. This time the corset was used as a rod of instruction.

 She came out swinging. When the girdle would connect to the backside of a boy, those straps that connected to her nylons would wrap around their legs and sting them. Two impacts for the price of one. This made a definite impression on my daddy. He might have been afraid of his daddy up until that point, but now, his momma had made her point. He doesn't ever remember running from her after that.

 Two impacts for the price of one well-placed swing.

We've heard of killing two birds with one stone, but maybe I'll have to start a new cliché'. Mine will be, "One girdle swat is worth 2 with a wooden spoon." Spanking isn't always the answer, but when it is, it can be quite an effective tool when done correctly.

I will tell you each of those "boys" loved their momma, and even though they were knot-headed, got into all kind of mischief, I never heard her say a bad word about any of them--yet another good trait to have as a parent.

 All we can do is the best we can do with what we know at the time. Considering everything my grandmother endured and overcame in her lifetime, she was an awesome grandmother and an amazing mom. May we all strive to do our best in the roles we've been granted as moms.