Saturday, September 19, 2009 humbled.

Have you ever been to a conference that has been overwhelming, volumous, uplifting, encouraging, affirming and confirming? Do you walk away from it exhausted? I am slap worn out after being in a wonderful women's conference today from 9 AM to 3 PM. Of course, I still had to come home, change the sheets, get the kids to clean their rooms, straighten the den, do laundry, etc., etc., etc., because when I'm not there it doesn't get done unless it's Georgina's week to come and clean the house. Thank you, God, for creating a wonderful woman named Georgina who prays while she cleans and does a good job to your glory.

I know I am suppose to be doing this without a doubt, and I know what God has given me is from Him because He confirms it every chance He gets, but it is still a scary thing to step into not only leadership, but the leadership of a ministry. There will be a lot that I will be held accountable for in the days and years to come, and a lot I will have to answer to the Lord for, so I want to make sure that when I speak, it is He who is speaking through me. When I move forward towards a plan or a purpose, that it is He who has put that plan or purpose in my heart. I want to be led. Is that odd for a leader to say? Especially a natural born leader as I was described today by someone who didn't even know me. Maybe, but that has to be a God-thing too.

I know He has been preparing me. I see it in what He has me studying. I see it in whom He has exposed me to. I see it in the limited training I've received and the books I've read. He has blessed me already in the women He has chosen as the Women in Ministry team. He has blessed me with a sense of humor and the ability to see His hand working. He has blessed me with knowledge and wisdom that can only have come from Him because apart from Him I am nothing. If I open my mouth and say anything of value, it is Him. Otherwise I am as a tinkling symble like Paul wrote. If I have understanding and guidance it is because He gave it to me. Apart from Him, I would fall on my face as well as this ministry. And with Him, I fall on my face but not in failure, but in awe reverence and appreciation for His willingness to use someone like me. Make me an instrument, O Lord. Make me a conduit. You are the Potter. I am the clay. Clay isn't rigid. It's moldable and flexible to the Master's hands and plans.

I love you, Lord.

Your Daughter,


1 comment:

  1. Glad all went well...wish I could have been there to watch! (and be blessed and challenged by a God through you!)


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